Start spreading the newsssssssss! The Yankees are leavin’ todayyyyyyyyy.
Swept? SWEPT?!?!? In my best Stephen A. Smith voice “YO TEAM, COULDN’T GET YOU ONE WIN? NOT ONE GAME?
The self-coined “Big Brother” to the New York Mets is joining them on vacation early in the post season once again. Did they make it further than the Mets? Yes. Did they also get swept? Yes. And ultimately came up short of the goal, a world series championship, just like the Mets. It’s quite funny actually how a lot of fans were calling for another subway series World Series this year, and neither team ended up making it. There’s something romantic about baseball, when the guy who broke the AL home run record (Barry Bonds has the real home run record, if you think otherwise, you’re a bigger clown than Aaron Boone) getting the final out of the season by grounding out to the pitcher. It’s not romantic how much the fans have turned on him.
Hey Aaron, there may be some people in the great state of NY who don’t appreciate you, but I’m sure you’d look great in some orange and blue! (But I’m not a rapper) I have faith Uncle Stevie will get the brinks truck ready. Enough about the Mets though, we’re here to discuss what went wrong with the Yankees. You can’t blame Chapman, he’s already off the roster. Here is your biggest problem right here:
From an outsider’s point of view looking in, this is fucking hilarious. What a fucking moron. Why would you show the biggest collapse in MLB history (maybe all sports history) that your team committed as a way to try and ignite a fire under your players?!? If I was a Yankees player, I would’ve told Boone to fuck off, straight up. Don’t show me videos of us blowing a 3-0 series lead as we’re about to get swept, you ass clown. Boone didn’t have the right idea or the right approach, this guy was selling air to a fish! You can’t play for a guy like that, but good news for you Yankees fans, you extended him this past offseason. He isn’t going anywhere!
Another hilarious thing that happened in this series from an outsider’s point of view:
Oh Gerrit. They were counting on you Gerrit! The Astros didn’t rock the baby, but they rocked you baby! HA Get it?
But in all honesty, the real reason the Yankees may not be able to get over the hump is because they are living in the past. Their fans living in the past of 27 championships, over half of which were before their parents were born! Their owners living in the past sticking with a GM and Manager who repeatedly let their fans and team down over and over again. And most importantly, they as an organization are living in the past by not letting players grow a beard. It is without a doubt the dumbest “rule” in all of sports. What are win the 1800’s? Get with the times New York! Beards are in and cool and you shouldn’t have to shave them to play baseball. Especially when you can just keep a mustache, what sense does that make? About as much sense as Aaron Boone showing the Yankees highlights of them losing in 2003. Or about as much sense as keeping Matt Carpenter in the lineup with how horrible he’s been playing lately. Guy was never this bad when he was allowed to keep his full beard, I’m just saying.
Another season in the books Yankees fans. In the words of Michael Kay “SEE YAAAAAAA.” But before you go, I’ve got one last question for you…